Everglow
by itsarches
Summary: "Goodbye, Onii-san. I hate you, with all my heart." When he heard the sentence, he had no idea of its severity. But the moment he realized feelings he unwittingly had, his resolve was questioned, and his true desire became unanswered. Under this everglowing emotions, and a series of complex misfortunes, his tenacity finally wanes. (Cover Image isn't mine)
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Oreimo. The amazing story and it's beautiful characters all belong to the rightful owner.

randomname9 here, I've been reading fanfics ever since I was a grade schooler, hoping one day I could make one too, but never managed to have enough desire to actually make it happen. But here I am now, 9 years later.

So after overcoming my horrible depression due to watching S2E12 of Oreimo. I got determined and decided to write this story. I apologize in advance for my English, as it's not my first language, and also for my lack of writing skills, this being my first written fictional story and all.

Then, without further ado, please enjoy! Here's the prologue!

* * *

 **Prologue**

Kousaka Kyousuke still remembered it, as clear as day.

This specific memory, one of the few that changed his life.

But why? Why this one? Why couldn't it be any other?

He hated it. It hurt, it hurt him so much.

He didn't want to keep it, as beautiful as he deemed it to be, he just wanted to forget it. If this certain memory could only cause him pain in the end, then what was the point of having it in the first place?

As he struggled to get his good night sleep, he gave up, and let the memory flow. He couldn't hold it forever, limits exist after all. He had been holding it this entire time, suffering through it all alone. He didn't want to show anyone that he's in pain, that he's emotionally shaken. He didn't want to worry anybody, especially those dear to him. He's a guy, he could take this, he just had to be stronger, he _needed_ to be stronger.

Too considerate, that's just the kind of guy he is.

The second he entered the kingdom of dreams, his memory poured out, like a river going downhill, flowing, ever-so-beautifully.

.

.

.

*Ding dong*

He was half-asleep on the couch then.

"Coming!"

He heard his sister's voice running down the stairs. He just remembered, her friends were coming over today, not that it mattered to him though.

"Pardon the intrusion!"

Or so he thought, until he heard a certain voice. An 'angelic' one, to be honest. He wondered whom that beautiful voice belongs to. Along with the voice, he felt something. It felt like the next few seconds would be a turning point in his life. The thought came down to him and confused him. Why did he feel that way? Or else, did he really feel so? Guess he was just imagining things, he was half-asleep after all.

"Excuse me."

And then, that's when he saw her. A girl, whose hair was as beautiful as the night sky, and face as gentle as the moonlight. He caught her eyes, and that's when it struck him, a certain feeling. He couldn't figure out what it was, it felt like a 'click'. He shrugged it off, as it was barely noticeable.

The girl then went upstairs with her other friend, which his sister followed later.

'I wonder what's her name..'

He had to admit, the dark-haired girl caught his interest. As far as appearance was considered, she's totally his type. Combined with her voice, she's like an angel from the heavens.

'Could it be that, God has sent an angel for me to take care of?!' the thought overwhelmed him for a bit, he was completely lost, like a 3-year-old eagerly waiting for his birthday party.

'Nah, there's no way, right?'

He went to his room, he needed something to distract him from his own thoughts. He was starting to imagine things. As he lay on his bed, the girl's face appeared again.

'…'

He couldn't settle down, he couldn't understand it, this surge of feeling that kept on coming from the bottom of his heart. It was his first time feeling so. It felt strange, yet calming at the same time. It was rather annoying, yet it gave him smile. It put him in a good mood, it made his heart race.

'What is this feeling?'

.

.

.

He could deny it all he wanted. He could distract himself from his own thoughts. He could try to forget it. Hell, he could get brainwashed or amnesia, he could erase his own memory. But a fact will always be a fact. It will all someday come back to him. He'll never be able to wipe off history, let alone his own. He could only accept it and move on in life.

The memory was from when he first met her, the midnight-haired beauty.

" _My name is Aragaki Ayase."_

That was the day when he had unconsciously planted the seed. The seed which would later bloom into a beautiful flower, at some point in his life.

That second, was one of his treasures. The minute, his mind had kept on replay. The hour, he wouldn't want it any other way. Although he hadn't realized it that time, that day was the day…

When he first fall in love.

* * *

 **A/N:** This chapter takes place somewhere in the middle of the story, so there's gonna be flashbacks and what-not in the first few chapters. How was it? I need some kind of response about it, I'll try my best giving the story the feelings it deserves. I want to create a beautiful story and I just might need your help for it, so please kindly leave your reviews! I'll probably update the story every 1 or 2 week(s), maybe with some occasional 1-week delay xD. See you on the 1st chapter!


	2. The Aftermath

**A/N:** And here's the first chapter! Special thanks to the first 3 reviewers!

FYI I don't read the light novels (and can't seem to find it on the internet), I only watch the anime so if there are any details from the LNs that I missed, I want to tell you guys that it is intentional. Try to think of this story as an anime-only continuation.

'. . .' Thoughts

". . ." Outspoken words

 _". . ." Outspoken words - Flashback_

* * *

 **UPDATE August 23rd:** Fixed tenses (I failed to notice some leftover present tenses, with this update I changed all of them into past tense. But please point out any mistakes you see, I'm still learning after all), and added a little bit more details (not really necessary to be read).

* * *

Kousaka Kyousuke.

If there's any need to describe, he was a normal high-school graduate, with a mundane daily life, and an obsession with 'mediocrity'. He lived in a normal household, with his parents and his little sister. To him, being 'normal', or just like the majority, is the calmest way to live life. He didn't really want any life-altering occurrence to happen in his life, all he wanted was to be relieved of any kind of problems, and live in an ever-stagnating environment. Wishful thinking.

But everything changed two years ago, ever since the perfect and flawless Kousaka Kirino; his sister who he had always seen as the star of everything, revealed her secret otaku hobby to him, not excluding her love of little-sister-themed eroge. The unveiling of the never-before-seen side of her marked the start of their 'life-counseling' sessions. And from that point on, things changed dramatically. With her forceful demands of Kyousuke's help, he had to say good bye to his dream of having a normal life. He could no longer be the normal guy he once was, and once longed to be. Not after he fought his father to defend his sister's indecent hobbies, lied to his first crush (and got hated by doing so) on behalf of his sister, got into a relationship (and later broke up) with his sister's otaku friend, and quarreled with his now-former best friend.

Not after.. he rejected the world's best girls.. because he ultimately had fallen in love.. with his own little sister…

'Ever since then, everything got soo messed up.' The soon-to-be college student recalled his unredeemable past as he drifted into his memories while lying on his comfortable couch.

'Well, you can't change the past, right? And it's not like I regret it or anything.' A half-truth, one might expect. Like hell there existed a guy who didn't regret breaking 3 girls' heart for his seemingly immature, childish infatuation for his own sibling. Not only that, but he also lost his childhood friend, whom at the same time had always been his best friend that was always there for him. Adding salt to the wound was the fact that he broke his first crush's heart to such an extent, where the meaning of the sentence shaped by her lips after he rejected her, left Kyousuke disturbed up to this day, still unable to fully process and understand the true meaning of it.

'I.. I need to make up, with all of them..' The only one of the three to actually accept his relationship with his sister, even though hurt at first, was his once-lover, Kuroneko. Though how far did her 'acceptance' go still remain to be questioned.

Actually, it's been 2 weeks since Kyousuke and Kirino made a certain promise, the promise which ultimately concluded their abnormal relationship. They promised that once school was over, and they graduate, they would return to their normal life, have a normal sibling relationship, and repair the bond with their friends, and with each other.

Saying that Kyousuke had moved on from his love for Kirino would definitely come off as a lie, but saying he was still in love with her didn't go out as a truth either.

'I might still be in love with her, just.. more in a sibling way?' Even he himself was still unsure of it, unsure of what to do next. All these bizarre turns of events always left him mentally fatigued every time he remembered it.

But despite his lasting confusion over his feelings for Kirino, lately there was something that had been troubling him more. He couldn't really describe it, but there's this some kind of 'emptiness' in his chest that just won't go away, no matter how he distracted himself. If he had to guess, the main source would probably be his promise with Kirino. When they were still in a relationship, Kyousuke's thoughts were full of Kirino. For Kirino, Kirino, and Kirino. All his feelings were diverted and dedicated only for her, that's probably why he didn't have this 'emptiness', for his heart was full of her. It wasn't that they got distant after the promise, in fact, their relationship stayed the same, just excluding anything lovers would do. Kirino was still his arrogant, cheeky little sister, but the fact that she was no longer his girlfriend probably left him with an invisible hole in his chest.

'But this promise is what she wanted right? I need to respect her decision, and be content with it. _'_

This wasn't the first time he thought of such sentence. Being the caring brother he was, he always spoke that sentence in his mind whenever he thought of Kirino's current feelings. He didn't dare to ask her directly, fearing of whatever occurrence that might follow.

Before the start of this irrevocable affair, Kyousuke had things that just might be able to fill in that hole in his heart. He had a best friend that was always there to give him what he needed, to always hear his problems and instantly come up with solutions for it. Back then, he had Tamura Manami.

And he also had another friend, not so much as a best friend, but a friend whom he shared many memories with. Maybe not all of them are good memories, but he treasured them nevertheless. Especially the memory in which they spent 30-days together, joking around, bickering, teasing and making fun of each other. With some occasional happening of foot-in-the-face for him, if he ever went too far in his jokes. A rare event occurred one day, where he happened to be able to dodge her kick. Albeit surprised, that alone wasn't enough to stop her in her tracks, because what followed suit was a 'run for your life' act, which gave the two an appearance of that of cat and mouse, chasing and screaming around the apartment block, as if no one was there to see or hear them. Back then, he had Aragaki Ayase.

'Ayase and Manami, do they still hate me?' He wasn't expecting to get an answer, but just hearing someone say 'No, they don't' would probably be able to at least relieve him off this building emotions and rising burden, even if just the slightest bit of it.

He had been planning to reconcile with Manami, all he needed was some courage and reasoning to be able to explain things carefully and successfully.

'If I tell Manami about the promise Kirino and I made, I might just be able to pull it off. Though I kinda doubt Kirino'll let me. If anything, she definitely hates her.' Looking back, Manami was the one who once stood as the one-and-only 'final boss' standing between Kyousuke and Kirino. She was the one who tried to drag them back to reality, spouting things such as what they had was incestuous, and therefore would not be socially acceptable. She also mentioned that their parents would definitely be against it, and what they had wouldn't last forever. Despite his retorts back then, Kyousuke surely knew that much. Knowing their parents, if they ever found out, they would definitely give him and Kirino harsh punishments, if not separate the two for all eternity.

'Maybe things just won't go back to the way it was with me and Manami.' Even with the regrettable memory of their last meeting, for some unknown reason, it unexpectedly didn't leave any meaningful impact to him. Just when he started to wonder why, the answer crossed his mind.

'…Or maybe we actually can, who knows right? I haven't even tried yet.' To the sudden emerging of the positive side of him, he chuckled. And the fact that she was once his best friend simply helped him out even more, since the term "ex-best friend" is truly rare, if not non-existent, in reality. Especially counting the time they've been together up until then.

But that chuckle slowly turned into a smile, diminished into a faint smile, and disappeared without a trace, as soon as he remembered the after effects if the developments actually take place.

'…If Kirino found out about it.. What will happen then?' The not-really-welcomed image of his sister arrived in his mind as he thought about it.

'Will she get mad? Will she even go as far as to ignore me once again?' The thought went further than he expected, concern started to gather as he dived deeper into his mind.

Until now, Kirino had never mentioned anything about Manami. So it was either she didn't really care, or she just absolutely hated her. Though knowing Kirino, it's probably the latter. Even so, that didn't seem to be enough to stop Kyousuke from making up his mind.

'I guess there's no point in thinking too much about it, if Manami actually manages to forgive me, I'll just try keeping it a secret from Kirino. And if she finds out anyway, I'll deal with it later.' With a burst of confidence, he decided his next course of action. Yeah, he was never really the man who overthinks the future. If something was going to happen later, he'll deal with it later, simple as that.

But then he realized, he was still in no place to have relief. The real trouble was still there, in front of him.

Explaining things to Manami wasn't going to be easy, but the true hardship that inevitably lay within his future, was how he's going to be able to explain things to Ayase. The kind yet violent angel was widely known as a total hater for everything indecent, none excluded. To tell her that he rejected her for his own little sister would probably be a world-ending disaster for Kyousuke. And if you think that that's the hardest part, then you're terribly wrong.

The only thing that could probably second her hate to indecent things, were utter lies. This easily concluded that lying to her was certainly not an option.

And when Kyousuke started to think about that side of her, it troubled him even more. He lied to her about not wanting Kirino, about his own feelings for his sister. But the most agonizing lie was the rejection itself, when he lied to Ayase about not loving her, not wanting her to be his girl. Because he did, and that fact remain unchanged, even until now. A first crush isn't something that could easily be shrugged off, even with the passing of time.

" _I'm sorry Ayase. I have another girl I like."_

He couldn't seem to be able to bring any idea to mind when it comes to solving things with her. His mind clouded by the ironically sky-clear memory, paying no heed to the amount of time spent between then and now. It felt as if the incident had just happened yesterday.

" _Baka Onii-san! Why don't you like me?!"_

The memory of her wails, the memory of her tears. The memory of her affectionate, yet painful kiss…

" _Sayonara, Onii-san. I hate you, with all my heart."_

And then it flashed to him, albeit still vague and unconfirmed, the true meaning behind that sentence, the answer he had always been looking for.

'…By ' _Sayonara_ ', she couldn't mean… right?'

Her last smile amidst her tears, and the final words she declared to Kyousuke. Her final farewell.

'Could it be.. she honestly.. never want to meet me again?'

If only he realized it sooner…

* * *

 **A/N:** If you need a slower-paced story, or if there are any details I missed (from the anime), grammar correction, misused vocabs, anything, please let me know. I'll be more than glad if it means making my story better.

Anon reviewer: I was trying to make it so that the storyteller (me) was an invisible character that follows the main characters everywhere they go. Which is why I used present tense, did it came out funny? (Seriously grammar just kills my brain sometimes. How about this chapter? I kinda changed it into past tense) **Edit** : The chapter is now full past tense, I think..

JColeTheKing: And you'll get more, I guarantee it! I'll even go as far as to say that if someday I 'abandon' this story before it ends, there could only be 2 reasons: whatever-disease or Death xD.

DarkGlass01: Thanks a lot for the suggestions! After reading your review I realized that my first draft was too short and rushed, so I completely overhauled it, which turned into what I think is better. I tried making a 1st person perspective version of this chapter, but failed miserably lol. So I settled with the 3rd person perspective, I hope you liked it!


	3. Set Plans

**A/N:** I know I've said this before, but English isn't my first language. I live in a country where English is never used for everyday conversation (it's probably used in some bilingual or international schools, but I'm not really sure either). So I don't really know how to naturally converse in English, my only source of learning being reading stories and watching films (aside from school lessons, of course). If the conversation in this chapter came out weird and awkward, please bear with me, your understanding is greatly appreciated.

* * *

 **UPDATE September 7th:** Fixed a few lines as pointed out by guest reviewer.

* * *

The room was now filled with a different air. The air was heavy instead of the mild, light-weighted like it was just now. Pressure and emotions joined hands and threatened him to abandon his calm, composed self, but-

"Stop staring at the roof like that, creep."

Kyousuke was only mere moments from getting emotional, when a very familiar undertone voice of a certain girl dispersed his thoughts (and the heavy air along with it) abruptly.

'Crap, she's here.'

He did expect Kirino to come in here eventually if he stayed for pretty long, what he didn't expect was Kirino entering the room without him noticing, was he that lost in thoughts?

"What are you doing? You can't be admiring that old roof now, can you?" She teased him with a mocking voice and a sneer on her face.

"Ha-ha-ha, very funny." He replied monotonously, he didn't really know whether he should be thankful or be pissed at her sudden entrance. His recurring thoughts were getting troublesome, but her coming would most likely spell a different trouble, and a more tiring one at that.

Kyousuke got up and started walking towards the fridge to get some drink, turned out he had spent nearly 40 minutes on the couch. He wasn't thinking out loud, let alone talking, but somehow he could feel his throat parched.

'I've been here that long? Time sure passes by.' 10.46 was written on the clock.

"So? Why are you here?" Taking a carton of barley tea out of the fridge, he asked Kirino who was standing idly by, eyes staring far away out the house's windows. She was apparently thinking something, judging by her slightly startled reaction when Kyousuke asked her the question.

"Ah, about that-"

"Let me guess, I have to tag along with you on another trip?" He said after a few sips from the carton, there weren't much left so he drank it all up.

Kirino smirked to his fast response, "A fast thinker, aren't you now? Things probably would've been easier if you had always been one."

"*sigh* There's no way I wouldn't expect another trip if you have been asking for the same thing for 3 days straight! Give me a break will you?"

Kirino had been asking Kyousuke to accompany her everywhere she went to these last 3 days, of course he was there to be her helper, or servant, one could say. As tired as he was, there's just no way of saying 'no' to the headstrong girl's requests.

"What are you talking about? You just got one, idiot." Kirino pointed her index finger at him, as if to emphasize her point. The dumbfounded Kyousuke could only respond with a single word,

"Huh?"

"*sigh* Seems your 'fast-thinker mode' didn't last for long, did it? What was I expecting from this idiot of a brother?" Putting a palm on her face, she mocked him to no visible end.

"Tch, just get to the point, what did you mean I got one?"

"Like I said, you just got one! It has no obscure meaning! How dense can you be?!"

Probably because of his tiredness, he was still slow on the uptake, "Huh? So, today.."

"I'm not going anywhere today, the trip is going to be tomorrow. This is why you shouldn't cut off people when they're talking, stupid."

Despite the continuous insult, Kyousuke's mood brightened at this. He finally got the day off he deserved, he badly needed some rest, which Kirino kinda (intentionally) failed to give recently. The only reason he woke up pretty early this morning was so that Kirino didn't slap him awake in the middle of his slumber, which happened yesterday. The last thing he wanted was welcoming the day with a bad mood.

"Ah, I see. Then you don't need to tell me today, do you? You could just tell me tomorrow."

"The reason I decided to tell you today was because I don't want you to have any plans for tomorrow, you're going to come with me, period."

His eyes twitched at the revelation, "Sounds like important, where are we going to go anyway?"

"I'll tell the details tomorrow, just make sure you can go." With hands crossed above her chest, she ordered him like a boss giving orders to her assistant, though that wasn't completely wrong at this point.

"Got it, thanks Kirino."

Kyousuke raised his right thumb up and gave her a smile while walking towards the door, which earned him a humph from her.

'Now, best go back to my room.' Still with a smile on his face, he took the first step up the stairs. He could already imagine the softness of his bed and the warmth of his blanket, with his current level of drowsiness, he might just fall asleep seconds upon arriving.

He opened his room's door and embraced the feeling of pleasure coming from within. He couldn't fathom why he wanted to sleep this much, he had been through worse, hadn't he?

'Whatever, right now I just have to lay on this bed right here and throw away all this exhaustion inside of me.' He tucked himself into his bed and closed his eyes. He could feel his energy being replenished as he drove further from this world, consciousness fading every second.

'…'

But what he had expected didn't come. With mind still firmly attached to his body, 6 minutes had passed and he was still wide awake.

'Damn it.'

It was his own fault though, the moment he wrapped his blanket around him, he started thinking about his plans of reconciling with Manami. He wanted to reconcile with Ayase too, but he decided to save the more difficult one for later. The angel was going to be tough to deal with, that's for sure.

'I guess I might try calling her as soon as I wake up later today... Or should I just do it now instead?'

Choosing between the two options took him longer than he so wished; 10 minutes had now passed before he finally decided.

'I'll call her later.'

And with that, he finally fell into a deep slumber. Now let's just hope Kirino didn't wake him up before nature does.

* * *

The sky was bright blue with bits of pure white clouds hovering above, adding to the natural beauty of such view. Taints of orange was starting to show upon the horizon, confirming the imminent coming of sunset. In the Kousaka residence, particularly in a certain 'mundane' room, the groan of a boy teenager was heard, signaling the return of his consciousness to the world.

With a big yawn and a little struggle, Kyousuke stretched his arms above to get him ready to get off his bed, after some more stretches here and there, he glanced over to the clock.

'3.30 huh? Got some good nap there.'

It took a few minutes for him to get his all 5 senses to start working completely, and right after, he felt the call of nature. So he got out of his bed and went straight for the bathroom, but not before hearing his sister's erratic laugh coming from the thin wall.

"Fuhihi, you're so cute, Sora-channn.." For this girl to say that kind of line could only mean one thing in particular.

'It's been a while since she last shown that side of her, must be a new game she bought yesterday.'

It nearly slipped his mind, but Kirino would probably wake him up if he heard that kind of laugh while he was asleep.

'Good thing I woke up before she started playing it, if that voice crept over to my ears and haunt me in my dreams, that would've been scary.' He sneered to his own random thought.

Although the possibility was very well close to zero, he rushed to the bathroom to avoid letting Kirino know that he was eavesdropping, he didn't want to get kicked in his current dozy state.

It wasn't long until he found himself in the kitchen, alongside the sound of rumbling stomach calling out for food. He searched the fridge for some reheat-able remnants as he was too lazy to cook for himself. Too bad for him though, Kirino had already eaten all leftovers from this morning's breakfast, leaving him with no choice but to make some food to satisfy his cravings.

"That kid, no care whatsoever for his brother, I see." Kyousuke said out loud with a pouty face. Of course, Kirino wasn't there to hear him, not that he wanted her to.

'No choice, I just need to make the simplest of meal then.'

After 10 minutes of struggle against his own laziness, he finished cooking a simple omelet rice. He didn't wait for anything to dig in, he was too hungry, and finished eating in a matter of minutes.

'Whew, that was good.' He said with some pride in himself, he was getting better at cooking, he learned from a certain someone.

'Now, what to do next?'

As he started to ponder around for something to do, the plan he had set came to mind.

'Ah, right. Manami.'

With an increased pace, he went straight to his room to take his cellphone and set the plan into motion. As his eyes gazed on the innumerable contacts on his phone, the name 'Tamura Manami' was highlighted. But just when he was about to press the call button,

"KYAA! THIS IS SO MOE!"

'!'

Cold shivers ran down Kyousuke's spine at the sudden squeal, to think his ears had to endure this horrifyingly awkward shrieks all over again was definitely not something he looked forward to.

'She's probably thinking that I'm still asleep, so she gets to scream whenever she wants, that idiot.'

He wouldn't want to call Manami to have her hear Kirino's screams from next door, since that would most likely crumble all his plans altogether, on top of adding embarrassment and loss of face, if he still had any that is.

'Better keep it that way, don't want her to catch me calling Manami. Now, guess I'll make the call from downstairs.'

He made his way towards the living room and sat on the couch, he was about to press the call button when something stopped him once again. This time it wasn't drowsiness nor was it Kirino's high-pitched voice, it was his own uncertainty.

'Is she going to answer the call?'

'…'

"What am I kidding? I won't know if I don't try."

Finally resolved, he pressed the call button that looked like it was eagerly waiting for him. _Beep, beep,_

"*gulp*"

The heavy air came back to surround him, the room was getting warmer, it was getting harder to maintain his resolve, and the continuous beeps were not helping in the least. Seconds felt like minutes, he waited and waited for the click to be heard from the other side, the pressure was starting to get to him.

'…'

But nothing came. Right before the bleep for voice mail could be heard, he immediately hanged up.

'She didn't pick up. Is her phone not with her?'

'…'

He couldn't be indecisive now, he did the first call, might as well go all the way through.

'Guess I'll try again.'

The second call was made, nothing. Third call, still nothing. Fourth, all the same.

At this current development, a sigh was all he could muster. The call didn't connect, not even once.

'She's probably in the bathroom or something, I'll try again later.'

To kill some time he just turned on the TV to look if there were any interesting shows currently on. He switched through countless channels, but not a single one caught his interest. Luck wasn't on his side right now; aside of his 1-day break off Kirino's forceful demands, nothing seemed to be going his way.

After 15 minutes of doing pretty much nothing, he picked up his phone and tried calling Manami again.

'I hope she's going to answer this time.'

The call marked his 5th attempt at it, this one should be successful.

But that's apparently not the case; after his 6th also failed attempt, he gave up.

'I know I shouldn't jump into conclusions too soon, but..'

As much as he tried to deny it, counting the incident, the answer was pretty obvious by now.

'…She's clearly avoiding me..'

* * *

 **A/N:** I'm still learning about grammar and tenses, so please point out any mistakes you see. I read in articles that writing a story in past tense is considered to be the better way to write instead of using present tense. In my own native language, there aren't such thing as tenses, but I must say that if I have to translate stories from Indonesian into English, it will be conveyed in present tense most of the time. Which is why I kinda find it hard to write in past tense.


	4. Once Again?

**A/N:** Some of you may have noticed that the first 3 chapters all ended in a similar way: emotional Kyousuke. Well, expect something different this time around.

'. . .' Thoughts

". . ." Outspoken words

 _". . ." Outspoken words - Flashback_

* * *

The orange tint that first appeared on the distant horizon started to creep over to the blue side of the sky. Whether or not the natural shade of colors was there to reflect Kyousuke's current state of heart remain a question forever unanswered. The surrounding environment called out to the disturbed boy, telling him to enjoy the beautiful view that barely even caught his attention. He was just a lone boy walking in the neighborhood, was all everyone who passed by him thought about him.

But you need to read a book to understand its story, because the cover is really nothing more than a shell concealing the inside from the outer world. After his 6th attempt at calling his former best friend got turned down, guilt and remorse entered his heart despite his futile efforts to repel them, much like how night comes without day asking for it. Out of desperation, he managed to send Manami a short message, asking her to meet him at a place they both knew very well.

He walked and walked for minutes, his only object of view was the space residing between him and the road he was on. Though he occasionally gazed over to the sky, strangely pondering on why he was out here instead of resting in his room. Kirino was giving him a day off, he should've used this needed chance as much as he could. But instead, he found himself tiring himself further, both physically and mentally, by ruminating continuously while walking down the course he himself had chosen.

He sent her the message already; to have doubts now was clearly a cowardly move. There was no point in thinking whether or not she would come, you can't predict the future, you won't be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel if you can't even determine which dark path you are going to take. So with a strong step, he walked on, to the place of memories.

When he looked up front, he realized he had arrived.

'Looks like she's not here yet, haha, what was I expecting?' The chuckle was followed by a slight pang of pain.

He closed his eyes for a second and took a deep breath.

The place overflowed with peaceful feelings, this is the place where two childhood friends used to sit together, gazing at the stagnating scenery in front of them. The park hadn't changed one bit; the old wooden bench that had always given them the place to relax while they enjoy the subtle breeze of wind; the compact tree branches and the gap roof that had always shielded them from the uncomfortable heat of sunlight; and the green trees and bushes that gave a touch of perfection to the already picturesque view. Overlooking the very minor changes, he was glad he was able to set his feet here once again, after such a long time.

Letting his honest feelings led him traverse through the path of life sure had its own benefits, because if it weren't for that, he probably wouldn't be here. Without delay, he sat on his usual spot. He smiled to himself and let the memories of an exhilarating childhood flow through his mind. Not the slightest hint of chatter were present, no ever-disturbing sound of footsteps could be heard. In this human-filled century, such peace could only be attained in a rare time at a rare place. And Kyousuke was one of that lucky people to be able to experience it.

The cool, light breeze coming from the lake only added to his state of serenity. He could spend a lot of time just to enjoy and preserve this feeling, which he kinda lacked lately, courtesy of a certain someone.

'…'

Traversing through his own memory somehow dragged him back to reality. Before, he had never been in this place alone, the feeling of the park was different now he had no one by his side. He thought about the days where he would, _could_ , converse calmly with his friend right here. Surely being alone here was more peaceful, he acknowledged it, but there was something more than just that. The peace was accompanied by the reality he never desired, and feelings he never wanted.

It was lonely, and he truly felt it.

"*sigh* Got to stop thinking like that."

He shelved that last thought and took a deep breath, inhale, and exhale. He repeated the cycle for a few times, mainly to reassure himself and boost up his confidence.

'Nothing will go your way if you aren't even sure about it yourself. Man up, Kousaka Kyousuke. Just.. be patient, she'll come.'

Even though he had no fact to back up his own words, he still had his spirit. Most of the time, that alone was enough to bend things to his will and wants, to some extent of course. And considering the current circumstances, he obviously only had that to hold onto.

And he once again successfully did it, holding his grounds strong had proven that he could win with willpower alone, tossing aside any unhelpful facts and doubts. Because after 15 minutes of waiting, what greeted him was,

"…Good evening, Kyou-chan…"

His widened eyes kept on staring at the beautiful, sky-mirroring blue-orange lake. His brain registered the voice his ears had received and gave him the thought he had been waiting for. He stood up and slowly faced himself towards his back. The moment he completely did, he stood there like a statue, lips dried, throat parched. They were in a stare down until he mustered all strength inside of him, all to repay the greeting he had received from the girl that was now right in front of him.

"…G-Good evening… Manami…"

He irked a bit because it came out stuttered, but he calmed down right after.

"Sorry to make you wait, Kyou-chan." Her faint smile was barely visible under the trees' shadows.

"It's okay, really. I haven't been here that long." His hand scratched the back of his head despite feeling no itchiness.

"I see…"

"So, looks like you received my message."

"Yes, I did. I also received your call, but missed it."

"Were you… doing something?" He blurted out a question he later regretted.

"Y-You could say that, I guess…"

"…I see…"

It was pretty obvious to him, by the indirect and vague answer she gave; she probably wasn't actually doing anything. She probably was just.. too nervous to answer the call. There was no way she wouldn't be; they had fought, and stopped contacting each other since then.

An uncomfortable silence ensued between the two. None had the ability and courage to spark a conversation as both are too unnerved because of what had happened weeks ago. Starting an everyday topic in this current situation wasn't really an option either. Saying it an awkward moment would very much be an understatement. Until Manami voiced out,

"I-I apologize, Kyou-chan!" Spouting words rather loudly, she bowed to Kyousuke, deep guilt coloring her voice.

Kyousuke was taken aback by her sudden act, without further thinking, he spoke out the first sentence that came to his mind, "H-Hey, no need to be so formal, we're fri-"

But instead, he felt the word stuck in his throat, the urge to say it came to a halt the moment he recalled past events. The word 'friends', in this current state, could he really say it? After everything that happened?

Manami was still deep in her bow, which made Kyousuke felt bad looking at her like this. So with a deep breath, he strengthened his resolve. He walked up to Manami, grabbed her shoulder, and pushed her to an upright state. The surprised Manami looked over to his face, but he looked to his side, still having no strength to look her in the eye.

"I'm the one who's in the wrong, Manami. You only tried to your best as the 'normal' you were, you tried to help me, but I turned you down." He took a few steps back to make some distance between them.

"If someone has got to apologize, that person would be me. I'm sorry." This time, Kyousuke was the one who bowed deeply, the sincerity of his feelings clearly drawn by the wavering in his voice. With any leftover strength he had left, he voiced over his apology to his friend.

His apology though, didn't at all mean he regretted all the actions he did, and all the turns he took. He was in fact glad to be with Kirino, to experience life as his boyfriend, and to have fallen in love with her, because for once, he was genuinely happy. It was just that happiness had a price to pay was all. He lost his best friend, and he also lost another treasured friend. And if he was to keep those feelings up, he didn't even want to think about the hellish torture that would follow; the shun by society, the grossed expression by those he held dear, and most of all: the disappointed look of their parents when the inevitable happened. As the guy he was, he probably could've persevered through it, but what about Kirino? That thought alone was enough for him to put aside his feelings for her and move on in life.

So instead, this apology was meant as a mend for the things he had done; he wanted to reclaim the price he had paid and this was the first step he had to take.

"P-Please, Kyou-chan, I was really harsh on you too back then. I ignored your feelings and told you all those bad things, when I could have done it in a softer way... I even slapped you! I was blinded by rage, and hate, and jealousy! I didn't even try to understand you! I stubbornly refused to accept things the way they were! So please.. just let me be sorry, for my selfishness, and for all the other things I've done to you..." Finishing her sentence, now in the verge of tears, she bowed yet again, seemingly even deeper than the one before.

"But those were the truth, Manami. As cold and as cruel as they were, you only spoke the truth. And being the idiot I was, I overlooked it, thinking I could bend every known rule in this world with my sheer desire alone. Even if you think you had made a mistake in what you did, the most part of it has to be blamed on me! So, I'm sorry, for being so selfish…"

The two teenagers stood still, each deep in their own bow, contemplating on their past self. The reason this happened in the first place was really because of their own mistakes; they had let their egoistical self got the best of them and torn the bond that was held for years.

Tears flowed freely down her glasses and dropped down; making darkened spots on the pavement they were on. At this moment Kyousuke knew, she was being very honest on top of being riddled with extreme guilt. There wasn't any sob, but it wasn't needed to know that she was obviously crying her heart out. Water started to form at the corner of his eyes, but he tried his best to resist it from making a full droplet. He couldn't find it in him to walk up and comfort her, at least not in his current fragile state, so he kept his bow and let silence be the one to stop her cry.

Time passed in a different kind of silence, this time it wasn't uncomfortable or awkward, rather, it was a pleasant one, most likely caused by the sincerity of their sorry feelings, and their heartfelt desire to be in a relationship they once were: Best friends.

After 15, maybe close to 20 seconds, they both looked up simultaneously (despite the absence of any intention of doing so), and noticed each other's reddened eyes. The unexpected act between the two triggered an event they would later cherish. As both of them gazed onto the other, a girlish giggle was heard, followed by a boyish chuckle,

"Pfft…"

"Kuku…"

It didn't take 3 seconds for the silent laughs to burst into a fully loud guffaw.

"Hahahaha…hahaha…"

"Hahaha..hahaha…"

Kyousuke knelt down as laughter filled every nook in his voice, with Manami similarly mirroring the act, albeit still standing on her two feet. They both held their stomach in response to the pain of tightening muscles caused by their own loud laughs.

It had been sometime since they had this sincere moment. The proceeding act seemingly released all their pent up feelings that had been held for what felt like years. The two laughed their hearts out at the tense moment they had shared before, tears formed at the edge of their eyes because of the complication of happiness, joy, and relief, stirring in each other's hearts.

The laughter lasted for a good moment before it turned back into silence. But this time, the silence was shared between two people who were now honestly smiling at each other. Manami opened her mouth, attempting to speak something, but was cut off by Kyousuke's sudden voice; he couldn't let the girl to always be the one to start the conversation, could he?

"Thanks, Manami, for forgiving me, and for everything else."

"Me too, Kyou-chan." She gave an honest smile to him, one that he had been unknowingly missing.

"Soo…" He -somewhat intentionally- let his sentence trail off.

"Friends once again?"

"…You bet!"

They beamed to each other brightly under the setting sun. It felt as if the surrounding environment breathed a sigh of relief and smiled at the last two sentences that were spoken. The bench, the trees, the wind, albeit silently, had always been their friends in this very place. They had 'seen' them growing up as time passed, and so, were joyful to know the two had now finally made up. With a breeze of cool wind, rustling of green leafs, and splashes of clear water; they 'congratulated' them for successfully mending their relationship. Kyousuke wiped the tear hanging on his eyes and smiled at the sky, feeling he might just have owed this park for the ability of reclaiming, and relishing this happiness.

"It's getting dark, should we go home?"

"Let me walk you home then, so we can chat a bit on the way." Kyousuke suggested.

Of course, she wouldn't ever deny the notion, "Yes, thanks, Kyou-chan."

* * *

"So there you have it, Ayase. See you tomorrow okay?" The cheerful voice of an auburn-haired girl spread across her fully decorated room.

"Y-Yeah, see you, Kirino." *click*

"Whew, that was a bit unnerving to say... Tomorrow, huh?"

Right now, she apparently just finished talking on the phone with Ayase. She also had finished playing the eroge on her computer, judging by the black screen on her monitor.

"Now, what should I do?" She looked at the clock and realized it was already 5.35 P.M.

"It's pretty late already, he should be awake by now."

As it turned out, it looks like Kirino had lost count of time while playing her newly bought eroge, the way she didn't realize that Kyousuke had been outside for quite some time now.

She was just opening her room's door before she heard a deep voice downstairs,

"I'm home."

'E-Ehh? He was out? So he was awake the entire time I've been playing?!'

Kirino effortlessly flushed herself when she thought about her irrepressible shrieks and what-not that flew out of her mouth during her game time. She remembered a certain scene that had occurred once,

" _Be quiet already! In case you haven't realized, I can totally hear you!"_

" _W-What?! Pervert! Eavesdropping on your own sister! Unbelievable!_

" _I wasn't! I could hear you without even trying! You can't yell like that just because Mom and Dad aren't home!"_

" _I-I can do whatever I want!"_

" _Then be a little more considerate, will you? Hearing my sister moaning from the other side of the wall is beyond awkward!"_

She tried to calm herself down before heading downstairs. Putting on a frown mask, she went down and asked him,

"You just got home?"

'Damn it, she's already done playing! I was out for too long!'

He searched through his panicked mind for a satisfying answer he could use, but could think of none. So instead of giving hazardous words he probably would find hard to explain, he let out a curt hum and a nod as the answer.

"…Have you been out the entire time?"

Kyousuke flinched; it would be pretty dangerous if she decided to ask where he went and what he was doing, he wasn't really good at lying. But he (gladly) noticed a missing point from Kirino's question, so he decided to go for it. An all-or-nothing gamble, one might say.

"What do you mean, 'the entire time'?"

Only then Kirino realized that she worded her question wrong, she had opened a door that Kyousuke could use to attack her anytime he wanted. A faint flush crept its way back to her face and she stammered despite trying not to.

"I-I was just asking since when have you been outside, that's all!" She tried her best to hide that little mistake she had already spoken out.

Kyousuke didn't miss her flush and used it to his advantage. With this, he could easily get out of her interrogation smoothly. So without waiting, he put on a smug smile and went on his way,

"Since you started playing your new eroge, obviously. I already told you how it was beyond awkward to hear you when you're like that, remember? So I took a stroll around the neighborhood to kill time. Though I must say, you _are_ actually pretty cute when you lose control on your own game, I might get used to it soon."

His sneer grew even wider when he saw Kirino blushing uncontrollably with every kind of rage and embarrassment written all over her face. It wasn't long until she scurried upstairs while screaming any kind of words that crossed her mind. In the next 4 seconds, all Kyousuke could hear in the house was " _BAKA! HENTAI! SIS-CON!_ " repeated continuously.

He put off his sneer and breathed a sigh of relief, he didn't think he would go about this easily after many plans he had devised before he arrived home.

"Seems I got lucky this time." Was his only thought before heading up to his own room and slump on his bed.

* * *

 **A/N:** I originally wanted the reconciliation scene in this chapter to be longer and involving a fully remorseful Manami crying over everything that happened between the three of them, but I settled with a lighter one for future developments in the story. I'm expecting you guys to have some questions including "what did they converse about on the way home?", etc. Well, all of those are going to be answered in due time, so stay tuned!

It pains me to say this, but college life has just started for me so I probably won't be able to update as often anymore. But I'll be sure to try putting out _at least_ 1 chapter/month, let's hope I won't be too busy…


	5. The Little Things

**A/N:** Just wanna let you guys know; after watching some AMVs and reading some doujins and fanfics, I found myself in BOTH Ayase route and Kirino route (I know that sounds stupid, f*ck me right?). I'm also gonna tell you that it's going to affect this story heavily, presumably adding more drama into it. I just hope I'll be able to write it satisfyingly for all of us to enjoy.

(Check out my profile if you guys want to know the titles of the AMVs, etc. that made me enter Kirino route.)

* * *

Kyousuke sat down on the chair as bullets of sweat tore down his nerves. He had just remembered a certain deal; one he made with Kirino not long after their promise. And that remembrance made him completely reluctant to go downstairs to eat dinner.

Unluckily for him, Daisuke always demanded that if all 4 of them are home, then they all should eat dinner together at the table, and tonight was no exception. He had considered to just go straight to sleep, but his rumbling stomach wasn't helping him in the least.

His mother put 4 plates on the table, every single one screaming delicacy as they were having curry for dinner, yet his heartbeat was far too loud for him to hear the food's call.

The reason for his intense panic was because that this was the time where he would get a smack or two from the monstrosity known as Kousaka Kirino; at least his mind strongly suggested so. Oh his room would be such a lovely place to be in right now.

Kyousuke shifted a bit on his seat and tried to calm himself down, Kirino still hadn't acted like he thought she would, were his thoughts nothing more than mere assumptions?

He silently gulped as he peeked over to his left, he was still expecting a dark aura to surround the girl sitting beside him, but as it turned out, the beast inside was nowhere to be seen, much to his surprise. His current little sister was being a simpleminded girl whose eyes were occupied with excitement from looking at the plate of great taste being served in front of her.

Kyousuke dissipated the tense atmosphere he had suffocated in and relaxed. He should thank his mother for this special servings; it was incredibly perfectly timed, as if she was intentionally trying to help him.

He decided to shelve off the disturbing thoughts for now and just eat the food. Why should he sacrifice his enjoyment for something that probably wasn't meant to happen?

The dinner went calmly without much conversation, Kirino was the fastest to finish, it went unknown to him how she finished hers so fast when there was still more than half left on his plate. She put her plate in the sink, kissed their parents good night, and rocketed upstairs. He let a few minutes pass before breathing a sigh of relief, so as not to give his parents any food for thought.

Kyousuke finished last and did his everyday task of cleaning all of the family members' tableware. His mother helped him a bit before going off to her room, they bid each other good night as she left.

Kyousuke quickly made his way up after he finished everything he had to do downstairs, his exhaustion from the day's events finally caught up to him. He stopped right in front of his door and fixed his eyes on the door to his left, light slipped from the little gap under said door, and reminded him of the nervousness he had before,

'Looks like she's still awake, I better go to sleep before she makes any ruckus.'

He turned his door knob ever-so-vigilantly and pushed it in full slow motion to avoid making the faintest of sounds that might very well mark his demise, but,

"Took you long enough."

Shivers were sent down his spine upon hearing the voice of an uninvited demon in his very own room, the night probably wouldn't pass that easily.

'Damn it, how come didn't I expect this?' He silently scolded himself, though there really wasn't anything he could do to avoid this.

"What were you doing? I've been here for like half an hour, how long did you plan on making me wait?"

She was apparently laying down on his bed, her eyes still fixated on her fingers that was playing at her hair.

"I was washing the plates, yours was in there too so try blaming yourself a bit." He said as-a-matter-of-factly.

"Washing an extra plate won't take more than a minute, you're just a slowpoke."

"Then it's your fault for finishing your food so early, you could have spent more time at the table, you know?"

"Then mom and dad would catch me walking into this room, is that what you want? I bet it is, you crazed sis-con." She said with a tinge of pique in her tone, her figure now settled in a sitting position.

'C-crazed sis-con? I don't want to hear that coming out of a total bro-con.' He planned to speak that out loud, but decided not to for various reasons; one of them being he had had enough drama for the day. He altered his next argument to finish the late conversation faster,

"Then why are you here in the first place? Don't tell me you're going to make me play your new eroge tonight? Listen, Kirino, I'm tired, I want to sle-"

"Geez, that's not it, idiot. Although I do plan on letting you borrow it, I won't give it before I finish all the routes myself."

'Figures. You never change do you?' He conceded as he sighed. "Then what is it?"

"Don't act like you've forgotten."

"Forgotten? What about?" Discomfort started to grasp his heart as speculations war inside his mind.

"Tch, this evening. When you came home." Her sharp tone confirmed what had only been his prediction.

The life-changing promise they had made brought with it a few smaller ones; deals they made together to further bury their inner desire to be with each other. Though the reasons were left unspoken, they both knew too well of each other, hence the deals' necessity to keep the promise intact. The one she just implied was the pact where Kyousuke was not allowed to tease or lie to her about something that could lead to a embarrassing misunderstanding between them. He was even forbidden from praising her with potentially-loving words such as 'cute' or 'beautiful'; save for some _very_ limited occasions, though by now he already had a specific, secret reason to cease from complimenting her altogether.

It was, as a matter of fact, rather unfair, because then Kirino would have all the permission to tease him all she wanted. But it wasn't anything new to him, more supported by the fact that he had grown accustomed to it, hence why he didn't object.

He looked to the side and grabbed the back of his head before answering, "…Alright, alright, I'm sorry, okay? I went too far, I didn't mean to tease you like that." His voice sounded very honest, because a part of him was wholly against the very idea of teasing her, but he needed it to be able to get away that one time.

The direction this conversation was going could very well lead to her asking about the place he had been and the things he was doing, which could actually kill him, with a chance of it being literal. Although that was someone else's special unique trait, the chance of Kirino also having it wasn't really zero either.

As he thought of that, his body heated up once again, the sheer temperature forcibly asking sweat to come out from all over his skin. But much to his surprise,

"Well, if you really are sorry then… I guess I'll forgive you, just this one time."

'Huh? She forgave me?' He was dumbfounded as relief washed over him simultaneously. He didn't quite expect the development, spending time with his little sister made him forget that his ex-girlfriend does have some _dere_ qualities.

"Thanks, Kirino."

"Oh, and one more thing, don't forget about tomorrow."

"Don't worry, I won't. That being said, are you still not gonna tell me where we are heading?"

"I'll give the details tomorrow, I told you that already."

"But, why? Any particular reason?"

"I-It's none of your business! I'll tell you tomorrow, period!"

'None of my business? Just how unreasonable can you be?' Putting his right palm on his face, he sighed once more, probably the hundredth time that day.

"What's the facepalm for?"

"Nothing, really. Then, is that all?"

"Huh? Yeah, I guess."

"Then will you get out? I want to sleep. You don't want a sleepy partner for tomorrow, right?"

She nodded and walked slowly towards the open door, slipping an elbow hit on his waist while she was at it. Kyousuke put on a defeated smile as he turned off the lights, slumped on his bed, and closed his eyes.

But just when the door was about to be shut,

"…Good night, _aniki_."

His eyes shot open at the sudden sweet voice echoing across his room, a soft blush forced it's way to his face as he stuttered the nightly manners,

"…G-Good n-" *click*

She didn't even try to let Kyousuke finish his sentence before shutting the door tight.

'That girl…'

'…What a cu-.. troublesome little sister…' He choked at his own last thought.

A warm, inadvertent smile settled on his face as he closed his eyes, all the while letting the serene darkness of the night fell upon him, drifting away his consciousness with every passing seconds.

* * *

The day started off rather peacefully, chirping sounds of birds accompanied the warm sunlight in greeting every living and non-living things that existed. And it was case on point for Kyousuke, judging by how he was still deep inside his own dream world. What kind of dream he was having though, none dared to ask, as his dreamy expression was pretty self-explanatory to those that could see him; the dream was more than likely a pleasant one, if not indecent.

His wandering hand arrived on his face and wiped the water hanging on the side of his mouth. His morning dream apparently didn't last very long as his eyes suddenly snapped half-open, his brain registering his surroundings.

Still dozy, his eyes squinted while he set his body on a sitting position. He took his time gazing around and noticed something visibly strange; his curtain was wide open, letting the yellow sunlight pass through the windows and light up his room.

'That's weird, pretty sure I left it closed last night.'

Noticing it was already bright outside, he decided not to think too much about it, his mother probably came in to wake him up (though unsuccessfully), besides, it didn't look like it was still 'morning' after all.

He let out a loud yawn as a sign of fulfilled sleep and stretched his hands out. He walked out of his bed, and went straight to the bathroom. While he was taking the stairs down, he started wondering about his schedule for today,

'Come to think of it, she also hasn't told me what time we were going to go.'

'Well, the 'details' are probably going to cover it up anyway.'

Finishing his morning routines, he took his steps out of the bathroom and walked towards the kitchen. He wondered what time it is, how he had forgotten to look at his clock before leaving his room passed him completely.

He opened the door to the living room only to see Kirino sitting comfortably on the couch, currently in her housewear that consisted of pink T-shirt and blue shorts. She was reading a fashion magazine with a soft smile on her face, giving away to Kyousuke the fact that she was currently enjoying the moment.

It took a few seconds for him to realize that he was staring at his own little sister, top to bottom. He resisted the blush that was creeping up his face and voiced his morning greetings,

"Good morning." He spoke out lazily as he made his way towards the kitchen.

No response. Of course, what did he expect?

He found out that the food was still on the table, pretty unusual considering his mother always used to tell him to look for leftovers in the fridge. But he dug in nevertheless; it didn't really matter to him anyway. As a matter of fact, it was easier and faster because then he didn't have to reheat it before eating.

While he ate his breakfast, his glances went over to Kirino every now and then. The act weren't mirrored though, for her eyes were already preoccupied with the magazine she was reading. He wondered why she hadn't voiced a thing since his coming, the silence was starting to annoy him.

Even after he had finished having breakfast and cleaned his eating utensils, Kirino still sat quietly on the couch, her content smile still spread across her slightly-rounded face.

'Is she really not going to say anything?'

She did say she was going to give him the details today, but it was killing him to not know of anything when the trip could just take place in the next very moment. What if they were going this afternoon? Looking by how bright it was outside, it could already be very late in the morning, what if she actually forgot to tell him?

Although he didn't want to make her put off that cute smile of hers or even worse; ruin her mood, his question was one needed to be asked. With that in mind, he cleared his throat and resolved to ask her,

"Hey, Kirino-!"

Much to his surprise, she turned her face to him at a speed faster than an instant. Any signs of her former smile had fully disappeared, and were replaced by a frown and a piercing glare.

"Tch, what is it?" Her exasperated tone unbidden by even the slightest hint of care.

"Come on, don't be so rude, I just wanted to ask." He put on a faint smile to try to calm her.

"Then just spout it already, I want to go back to reading this." She pointed her finger to the magazine that was on her lap, which made Kyousuke pout a bit; to think that her magazine was more interesting than a morning conversation with him somewhat hurt him on the inside.

He took a shallow breath before continuing, "You haven't told me our destination and what time we'll be leaving, shouldn't you tell me already? I mean, I need time to prepare you know."

As he finished his question, he suddenly noticed the change of aura around Kirino; her eyes seemingly full of colors once again, automatically dispersing her earlier glare. It almost slipped past him, but he could swear he had seen her cheeks reddening at his last remark.

"Ah, you're right, I haven't told you yet." She surprised him yet again by giggling softly.

'She actually forgot? What the hell.' Kyousuke mentally facepalmed at his sister; after all her reminder just the day before, she forgot when the day comes?

"…"

"…Well?"

Kirino spaced out for a moment; her eyes stared blankly at her magazine, while her fingers continued dancing around her light brown hair. Kyousuke took this time to study her gesture; the way she tensed a bit at his question could probably mean only one thing in particular,

'She's nervous? C-Could it be, we're going somewhere we've nev-"

The thought never even finish as he looked upwards and caught Kirino's eyes that were now brimming with blazing determination. How or why she had that kind of eyes, Kyousuke couldn't fathom until she declared a bizarre, hard-to-comprehend statement,

"…We're going to my modeling shoot."

Time seemed to pause as his top and bottom eyelids drove further and further from each other, hell, if he was an anime character, his eyes were probably already wide open enough for his eyeballs to fall from their sockets. His jaw hanged downwards as his frantic brain searched endlessly for existing words that could describe his current reaction: Surprised? Not enough. Panicked? Probably. Baffled? Clearly. Happy? Absolutely. But it's not like he could show her that last one, right?

"…W-W-Wh…What d-did you… say?"

He stammered unbelievably long at Kirino's announcement, did he mishear it? Was his brain playing jokes on him? Because there was _no way_ Kirino would ever take him to her modeling shoot, or was there?

"L-Like I said, w-we're going to m-my modeling shoot! Are you deaf or something?" Kirino's cheeks flushed a deep shade of red as she attempted to reply, her eyes now averted from their earlier eye contact.

"…B-But… Uhh.. Why?" Was all he could throw out of his mouth, his incredulous self still trying to fully digest the never-before-heard sentence.

"W-Well, because I want to, obviously. Is that a problem?" She crossed her arms and put on her bossy character to mask her own embarrassment, a futile effort as her face was still deeply crimson.

Her answer stunned Kyousuke even more, why would she ever ask him to go to her shoot? And furthermore, just because she 'wanted to'? He didn't even buy her lie; there had to be some sort of motivation, because there was no way she would be unreasonable about this particular thing.

Finally starting to regain his composure, he fought his panic and flustered self in an attempt to converse normally,

"I-It's not like that, I was just caught off guard, that's all. I mean, going there was the least I could've expected."

To this, Kirino smirked, "Fufufu, what's this? Are you embarrassed? You're embarrassed, aren't you? Sis-conn…" Her soft giggle only added to the strength of her tease, which totally struck Kyousuke deep in his heart.

Ignoring her unnecessary taunts, he continued, "Why so sudden though? You said you just want to, but you've never even talked anything related to modeling with me before, and now you suddenly want me to go there with you."

Though he doubted she would give it that easily, he honestly wanted to know her reason. The obviously unprecedented event this would later lead to left him with so many questions he failed to shape into words.

"I-If you ask me why, then… It's, because… *mumbles*"

Kyousuke gulped, a part of him was greatly curious, but his other half was screaming in denial continuously, somehow afraid of her answer. Should he continue asking? Will the answer be something massive? World-shaking, even? Random crazy thoughts started passing by his mind as he staggered for his next answer. But nevertheless,

"Uh, Kirino? I can't hear you." His curiosity won, whether it would be for the best or worst he let it become nothing more than a question.

Her eyes repetitively darted between Kyousuke and her magazine, with the house's windows and furniture sometimes also the target of her short glances. Her face had a tinge of red to it, but not entirely flushed. A tense atmosphere hanged atop their heads as silence engulfed the room. Seconds felt like minutes before she finally spoke up again,

"I-I said, it's because I want to… thank… you…"

The revelation took him aback a considerable distance, "T-Thank you? What do you mean?"

A deep breath was apparent before she continued, "I… intended this trip as a thanks for you, for keeping up with me these past few days. I haven't given you anything lately and I know I can be a bit too much to handle, so I thought of something new you might be interested in… Did I, make the wrong choice?"

As she gave that last question, sky-blue eyes met carbon-black eyes. Only then they both realized they were blushing profusely, and that their eye contact only seemed to add to the intense moment of embarrassment shared between them. Seems that this was why she had held on to the details until the day arrived; she wanted to surprise him, while at the same time fearing rejection from him. Noticing his sister's rarely-showed vulnerable and honest state, Kyousuke closed his eyes and gave a bit more thought for his next answer, settling with his true feelings,

"…No, you didn't make the wrong choice, I think. Well, it's true that it's probably going to be a bit embarrassing for me to go with you there. But, if you're okay with it, then I'll gladly accept the offer." Finishing his sentence with a smile, he was greeted with her brightened expression.

"Really?!" Her eyes glistened just like a little girl.

"Yeah, but, am I really allowed to come? You've talked about this with your manager, haven't you?"

"Of course I have, I've already told the girls too, you don't have to worry about anything."

"I see, that's good then."

"O-Okay, you better get ready then, we're going this afternoon, 3 o' clock. Don't be late, you hear me?" Her childish cheerfulness didn't last long before she returned back to her usual self.

"Understood, is what I wanted to say, but… You still haven't told me where we're going."

"Don't say it like I was forgetting it, stupid."

'Even though you did?'

"The shoot is going to be at a nearby park, probably 15 minutes walk or something."

'Great. A walk to the park alongside a pretty and well-known model, the perfect way to attract unnecessary attention, just great.' He admitted, he wasn't exactly unhappy about it; but just rather nervous. When Kirino was still his girlfriend, he almost never had this kind of nervousness, and that fact had him ponder sometimes, how the both of them changed ever since the promise.

"Listen, you have to be ready _before_ I do, or else." He thrust her finger to Kyousuke to make sure to get her point across, to which Kyousuke obliged,

"Got it."

And with that, their morning conversation came to an end. With unstable heartbeats still in each other's chests, they left for their respective rooms. Tired of the constant and repeated blood rush taking place over a very short period of time, Kyousuke went up first. He arrived in his room and finally took notice of the time.

'11.48, so I still have about 3 hours to prepare.'

At some point during the days of their relationship, Kyousuke would sometimes wonder when will Kirino let him go with her to her modeling shoot. For reasons involving his own pride, he never had the courage to ask her directly. An implication was as far as his desire had gone,

.

" _Where are you going, Kirino?"_

" _To my photoshoot."_

" _Want me to accompany you?"_

" _Eww, gross, aniki wants to see me modeling *giggles*. No need, see you later, Kyousuke."_

 _._

She left with an unsettling grin that day, and left Kyousuke disappointed nonetheless.

'So this finally happens huh?' He blushed yet again thinking of the upcoming unprecedented.

He needed something as distraction to kill time, he was incredibly flustered at this probably-once-in-a-lifetime chance of going with her to her modeling shoot. She was an impeccable, flawless model after all; to be able to see her on the spot and not from pictures would definitely be something to remember.

But as if trying to rob his joyous state and force reality upon him, a memory flashed; not completely out of topic, as a matter of fact it was one strongly related. He was going to go to her modeling shoot, and she had clearly implied that her friends were going to be there too.

'…Her model friends… T-Then…'

A recall of the past filled his mind and left him thunderstruck; clear memories ensued of the times where he used to admire another well-known model of absolute beauty, to the point where he would call her an angel and even bookmark webpages that contained her photos. The girl that he first crushed on, yet also the same girl he rejected.

This turn of events particularly meant he had one other reason to be all excited, flustered, and afraid, to go there. And it was pretty damn obvious,

'…Will she… Will Ayase be there?'

He was, undoubtedly, joy-filled at the possibility of meeting her again. But, what kind of face would he need to wear if he actually met her? After god-knows-how-long they hadn't met each other, an absolute awkwardness, at least for him, felt inevitable.

There was also one more problem: 'feeling guilt' was probably oversimplifying it, but the way that Kyousuke was completely in the dark regarding the matter of his relationship with her actually troubled him more than he anticipated. Since their last encounter at his old apartment that sorrowful morning, they never even contacted each other again. Not because he didn't want to, but more because he broke her heart horribly, and contacting her after such a disaster was a definite no-go for him; partly because he too, was in a fragile state.

The first few days after he rejected her put him in deep contemplation over his course of action; he mostly spent his time in solitude in his room either staring blankly at objects or looking for things to divert his thought, although failing horribly in the case of the latter. It took him more than a week to finally come to terms with his own decisions.

He still hadn't come up with any ideas to reconcile with her, so with this trip on his to-do list, and the possibility of meeting her there, devising some would be the most logical thing to do.

'Guess I'll take a bath before making some plans, don't you dare let me down brain.'

* * *

 **A/N:** After spending some time reading other fics, I actually want to make some future chapters to be conveyed in 1st person perspective (blame camain1s' Dancing Thoughts for putting this idea in my head), the 1st one probably when we reach the point when the events in the prologue take place. But before I do, I want to know what you guys think about it. Some might find it strange, but altering perspective in the middle of a story isn't something entirely new, is it? Please leave a review on whether you agree or object, and please also write the reason for your answer, I really need a feedback so I can write a good story for all of us to enjoy. Your opinion matters, really.

(P.S.: With this chapter, I changed the summary to reflect the story better, now that my view has changed. I hope you guys are going to like it!)


	6. Reasons to be Resolute

**A/N:** So first of all, I owe you guys an apologize.. Sorry for the 3 months of no update.. My keyboard partly broke and that resulted in some keys becoming defective and can't be pressed. I've done pretty much every way possible trying to fix it to no avail, so that left me with no option but to either service it or buy an external keyboard, which is kinda expensive for my allowance..

So how did I write this chapter? I used on-screen keyboard to compensate for the defective keys.. And I can't begin to explain just how annoying it is to have to move my hand to the mouse just to write every other word.. It just kills the mood of writing for me, and that's why I write very slowly, so sorry for that.. But yeah, until my keyboard gets fixed, the next chapters will most likely be delayed just like this one, I hope you understand my predicament.. (also, college life sucks..)

* * *

"…The hell's wrong with me?"

And that marked the 8th time he cursed himself, all because of his lacking ability to think of any idea for what could turn out to be a chance encounter.

Right after he had finished his bath, he quickly put on some clothes, took an empty writing book, and sat on his table. He was all serious about this; he wanted to be able to converse again with his lovely angel and he felt the need of a well-thought plan to do so.

Why did he need it? Obviously because she was going to be tough to reason with, and in a battle, sometimes strategy is what makes you come out victorious. At least, that's what he thought.

But much to his dismay, his brain had malfunctioned terribly; utterly failing to let him scratch out even the slightest bit of an idea. His writing book had been open for well almost 2 hours now, and not the tiniest pencil dust had tainted its bright white color.

He was undeniably frustrated at his own self, was there really nothing that could be easily pulled out? Or was there something holding him back? Even he wondered the answer,

'Last time with Manami, even though it didn't go as smooth as I had hoped, at least I was able to pull one.'

'…But why can't I think of anything when it comes to Ayase?'

He looked upwards and locked his sight upon the ceiling, eyes drilling through it; futilely trying to find something that could probably be hiding on the other side of the wooden board. He began stretching his hand towards the air on top of him, his palm open as if trying to reach out to something that was invisible, or outright non-existent. His vision went blank for a while as he re-entered the world that is his mind, once again looking for the faintest hint of an idea in case he had it deep inside.

'…'

Returning his gaze to the outer world, he relented from the mentally tiring act,

'Guess inspiration only comes every now and then, I should stop forcing myself.'

Nevertheless, he kept up a positive mindset, it probably wasn't because the matter was specifically Ayase-related that his brain halted some of its function, it was just as he said; inspiration only comes every now and then, he simply needed to give some time for himself to rest before retrying again.

'Come to think of it, I don't even know if she's going to be there.'

At some point during his hundred minutes of doing nothing that had just passed, he actually desired to know the fact of whether or not would Ayase be at the modeling place. But for some specific reasons, he decided against asking Kirino for the info. All because he feared the questions that chance to fly out of her mouth had he actually asked.

'…If the stars aligned and I actually do meet her, what will happen then?'

He continued his ceaseless wondering about the unforeseeable, yet inevitable future. If he were to meet her with feelings he still couldn't quite place, what would he say? What _could_ he say? He had spent some time thinking about this but nothing ever crossed his mind.

The complexity which he had put himself in started to overwhelm him as he thought about the existing circumstances,

'I don't think Kirino knows about Ayase's.. confession to me…'

'…And Ayase doesn't seem to know that I.. rejected her for Kirino…'

His thoughts were paused for a moment at some points, as more than a few words brought upon him a certain painful memory.

Up until now, Kirino had never mentioned anything about Ayase and him, easily giving him the obvious; she didn't know about Ayase's confession, because had she known, she would definitely confront him for the development; Ayase was his angel, and Kirino knew that all too well.

And in Ayase's case, she was more than likely unaware that she was rejected because Kyousuke had fallen for Kirino. He concluded so because, the indecency-hating angel that she was, she probably would never, _ever,_ accept such immoral relationship to exist in the society, even if the person who had it was her very own best friend. And the way that he had seen Kirino cheerfully phoning her on more than a few occasions easily gave confirmation to his theory.

'If the three of us gathers there… then…'

He thought about some problematic probabilities that could occur if he reconciled with Ayase right in front of Kirino, his mind once again failed at giving him a positive possible outcome if the reunion does happen.

'…Then I'll just do what I can…'

He wasn't exactly confident about it, but he knew he had some skills in improvising. Besides, it's not like there was any other choice anyway, he was all too plan-less to the point that improvising would be the only path open to him.

He looked over to his clock to confirm the current time, "Almost 2 o' clock, there's still time before we go."

Shrugging off his troublesome thoughts about his own patheticness, he decided to have lunch before they go, and left his room for Kirino's. Standing in front of her door, he brought his hand up in a knuckled position and a triple knock was heard soon after,

"Kirino, can you hear me?"

"I'm not deaf, idiot, of course I can."

As much as he admitted that he had already grown used to her mockeries, he was actually taken aback by how Kirino changed drastically from being more of a _dere_ during their special relationship, back to the _tsun_ he had always known and grown to love. This sudden change bewildered him for a while before he finally adapted to it.

"I want to make some lunch, is there any food you specifically want?"

"Not really, just cook a good one."

'Huh? That's rare, she usually orders something from me.'

Ever since he came back from his apartment, he had become pretty reliable in cooking, to the point where he would help their mother prepare any kind of dishes; be it for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. During their relationship as a couple, he would sometimes make food for them when no one else was home, more than often asking Kirino for her preferred food and taste so as to avoid wasting time, effort, and ingredients, in case he made something she didn't like.

This would only be the 4th time he made food for Kirino not as her boyfriend, but as her brother. The resulting food wasn't actually different in any way physically, but he admitted that the feelings and thoughts he poured in while making food for his little sister is pretty dissimilar than making food for his girlfriend.

It wasn't by any means less tasty, because she didn't complain about anything, whether outspoken or in gesture. But he had a different feeling in his heart every time he saw her eating his food now.

He didn't let the memories of those feelings consume him as he cleared his mind and went up to call Kirino; he had made them a katsudon rice, a pretty ordinary serving.

He actually wanted to make an especially-made feast just for the two of them to celebrate his first (and probably last, who knows what's going on in her mind sometimes) time going to her modeling shoot, but there were two problems: first, there wasn't enough variety of foods because none of the family members had gone to the supermarket yet, and second, he had no idea what to say to her in the event that she asked him why he made such abundance of foods. If he just straight up told her that it was to celebrate him going to her photoshoot, which he would never say, that would be too embarrassing for the both of them. And it was also more than likely that he would be rained down upon by an innumerable amount of "Baka!", "Hentai", "Siscon!", or even "Sexually harassing deviant!". Wait, that last one, that wasn't Kirino's line, was it?

Hell, at the utmost worst, she would probably cancel the trip altogether and lock him in the house. No amount of time spent with her seemed to be enough for him to be fully capable of reading her mind; she had this ability that always makes her capable of surprising him with the unexpected and unforeseen, much like how she just did this morning.

"Kirino, the food's ready, don't take too long or it will get-"

*SMACK*

"OUCH! Damn it! Don't open it so suddenly!"

"It's your fault for standing too close to the door, stupid. Come on now, we'll go as soon as we finish eating."

Without any signs of sympathy, she skipped downstairs cheerfully all the while humming a certain tune.

'*sigh* At least she's happy.'

Still with the lingering numbness on his face, he slowly made his way to the dining room and took his seat in front of Kirino. It had become his usual spot whenever their parents aren't home, a habit that first took place when he started cooking for her, and a habit he still found hard to dismiss.

Kyousuke attempted some conversation while they were eating but was always shot down by her (very) short answers, she didn't took long to finish her lunch, she put her plate and spoon in the sink and quickly made her way upstairs, but not before giving a warning to Kyousuke,

"I'm going to change now, and remember, be ready before I do. You hear me?"

"I hear ya, Ms. Model."

Seemingly ignoring his tease, she quickly disappeared from his sight, and just a few seconds later, a loud bang was heard; looks like she entered her room in full excitement she closed her door so hard. He chuckled to himself and made sure to clean all the utensils in the sink before heading up to his own room to change his clothes.

He got out of the house now fully dressed, wearing a black hoodie on top of a dark blue shirt, coupled with a pair of light blue jeans and white sneakers, he had completed his 'cool guy' appearance, of course courtesy of Kousaka Kirino.

When he had exited his room, he looked around and noticed that Kirino was still in her room, probably still getting ready, of course she would take longer; she had much more to prepare: make up, clothes, etc. He went outside first so as to avoid her scolding as much as possible, it was already 2.50 after all, they should be going any minute now.

"Ready?"

Speaking of the devil, not more than 20 seconds later, Kirino opened the door and revealed her amazing outlook to him; she was wearing a pink frilly sleeveless dress that reached out to her knees, the chest portion of the dress clung tightly to her figure while showing a fair amount of skin just above her chest, though still far from being indecent. A palm sized pink ribbon decorated the dress in a perfect match at the right side of her waist, with the final addition to exemplify her impeccable self and fashion-sense was a small bag with golden glitter spread across its taintless white color.

It was rather simple actually, but the charming aura she radiated had always been more than enough to make Kyousuke blush.

"Yeah, let's go." Trying to hide his flustered face, he looked away and put a serious effort to act calm.

She unwrapped the umbrella that she had brought to repel excessive sunlight, and started making way towards the destination.

The walk to the park started off rather awkwardly, an obstinate tense atmosphere never seemed to be letting go under the dry air and the cloudy sky. They were walking side by side in an overwhelming silence his heart started to race over the uncomfortable pressure. An amount of blood streamed to his face in effect to the quietness, coloring it a slight crimson.

The redness stilled for a while as he stole a glance and two towards the charming girl beside him, trying to see her expression regarding the current atmosphere. It was to no avail however, as she was facing to the opposite side of where he was.

Resolving upon himself to break the awkward situation, he decided to start a topic of conversation, it didn't matter what it was about; if it could get them off this heavy air then he would be more than willing to do so.

" **Hey."**

The simultaneous call surprised the both of them, seems like he wasn't the only one who had grown agitated of the lingering silence.

"Ah, what is it Kirino?"

She shook her head in response, "It's nothing, you first."

"Weren't you the one who told me that 'boys should listen more than talk'?" He quoted a sentence she once said, adding a grin when he finished.

Kirino pouted (cutely at that) to Kyousuke's remark, and made him smile unintentionally. She grumbled for a second before letting out a sigh and spoke,

"…Why are you being so quiet?"

"Huh? W-Well, if you ask me why, then…"

The unexpected question left him utterly failing to give her any answer; what could he say in this situation? That he was too abashed and lost his ability to talk? Or that he was too eager to look her in her modeling poses he lost himself imagining?

The problem was both were true to some extent, which was precisely why he couldn't say it. Should he lie then?

"…"

"…"

He walked in quiet for seconds as he glanced yet again at her, but what greeted his vision rather shocked him;

She was staring at her phone with increasingly dulling eyes, startling Kyousuke in confusion as he wondered what had happened.

'Is she… In a bad mood?'

Kyousuke mentally slapped himself, how couldn't he notice it sooner? His sister had been saddening over something for quite some time now, and all he had been doing was exciting over the fact that he was going to see her modeling.

Deciding to cheer her up first, he started thinking about a way to do it. It wasn't long until a particular one comes to mind, but,

'Will she let me?'

Kyousuke wondered if this was one of those moments, moments in where he would be able to get away after praising her. But he had no choice, he didn't want to see Kirino like this, so he went on and answered her earlier question,

"…You see, Kirino,"

"..?" She looked over to him with brightened eyes, either masking away or shrugging of the former dull.

Kyousuke took notice of this and continued, "Look, I'm invited to a reserved place where I can see a.. beautiful model having her photoshoot, you can't blame me for my quietness. I'm flustered, okay? Every guy would." He looked to the opposite direction as he blushed mid-sentence.

"That and.. you look.. amazing… So, you gotta do your best, okay?"

He found it rather hard to honestly compliment her ever since their promise. Partly because of their little deals, but mostly because of a certain occurrence that followed the promise.

He braced himself for a kick to the gut which never came, all because she was too busy mirroring his act as the color red decorated her stunned expression. Her reaction was delayed for a moment as she stuttered, "W-What do you think you're saying, _b-baka._ "

Kyousuke sighed and smiled before taking in the moment; the awkward air had dissipated and was replaced with an atmosphere of pleasure, much to his enjoyment. With the heavy atmosphere now gone, he decided to ask something that had been bothering him,

"By the way, did something happen?"

"What do you mean?"

"I can see you're not in a good mood, Kirino. You can't hide that from me."

She frowned upon hearing that, on top of not letting any answer fly out of her mouth. Silence lingers for a while before Kyousuke spoke,

"It's okay if you don't want to tell me, but if you change your mind, I'm all ears." His reassurance eased her as her frown slowly disappeared.

"Yeah."

They then chattered around like they normally would until their destination greeted their vision, to which Kirino quickly dashed while Kyousuke kept his pace, afraid of the uncertain future.

'Is Ayase here?' He quickly glanced around to confirm her unhidden, easily distinguishable presence, to which he found nothing. Breathing a sigh of relief, he continued walking towards Kirino.

Kirino introduced Kyousuke to the staffs and a couple of her friends, as her brother, obviously. He wasn't expecting anything, was he?

Kyousuke was told to not get too near to the photoshoot area so as not to distract the people doing their job there. While waiting for her, Kyousuke went to a nearby store and bought an iced tea. After that, he took a seat distant enough for the cameraman and the models to still have their needed space. He quickly found himself mystified at Kirino's modeling skills, her radiant smile was far brighter in person compared to in pictures. Her poses struck an arrow deep into pretty much every guy's heart, showing just how much of a professional model she was despite her young age.

The other two were too, in fact, cute models. But if one tried comparing them to Kirino, then it would be like comparing the stars to the moon. Every single one of them was beautiful, sure, but stars were far more common and emanated far dimmer light. The moon, however, was truly one-of-a-kind, and she irradiated light enough to bright up even the darkest nights, a feat impossible for the stars to do. She stood out far more than the others that when one took even as little as a mere glance, the memory of such scenery would be etched far into the back of their minds.

His expression right now would be one hard to describe; there was a tinge of red on his cheeks, but his other facial features didn't quite support that of an embarrassment. His eyes weren't wide awestruck like it was seconds ago, his no longer agape mouth changed form into that of a content smile.

He closed his eyes and took this moment to be honest to himself; he was happy, happy to look at her enjoying her life, happy to be able to be by her side, happy to be at this very place. But most of all, he was happy to be her brother, more than anything. Because by being her brother, he would be able to love her eternally. As siblings, no matter how far they're separated, a string of force would always be able to link them together; because it is the bond they had naturally grown up with, and will always be caressed through time.

At least, he forced it upon himself to think that way, all for the sake of extinguishing what little left of the flickering abnormal love he had for her.

When he opened his eyes and gazed back at Kirino, he caught her eyes. Responding accordingly, she immediately averted her eyes back to her friends. Kyousuke chuckled at the not-unusual reaction of hers and smiled yet again.

She glanced over to Kyousuke every now and then, with eye contact happening on a rarer basis, sometimes resulting in a faint blush shared between the two.

The seemingly perpetual act lasted for a good amount of time before Kirino was given the time to rest. She took her time conversing with her friends before walking towards Kyousuke.

"Here, good job out there." He gave her the extra ice tea he had bought before.

"Yeah, thanks."

She gulped the ice tea in quick successions as she drowned her mind in its freshness. To those who don't get it, modeling might not sound like much of a job, but it's actually more tiring than one would expect. Kyousuke let her savor the moment before voicing what had been in his mind for some time,

"You're amazing, Kirino."

"Of course, who do you think I am?" She smirked, bursting forth her natural confidence.

"I know, you're Kousaka Kirino after all, the world's best _imouto-san_." Kyousuke added a sneering grin to his praises, and was replied with the brightest smile she had given since their fake wedding, filling his heart with overwhelming content feelings in the process.

The light conversation filled the air with joy and happiness, a pleasuring feel he had been missing so. This shared treasureable moment with her was everything he could ask for, he admitted. But suddenly, confusion arrived alongside a thought,

'I wonder, what was that pang in my heart just now.'

Ignoring the not entirely new feeling, he continued chatting with his precious little sister.

15 minutes passed rather abruptly, marking the start of her next session. She dashed towards the crew who had supposedly moved considerably further from Kyousuke's seat. He didn't bother moving however, as this bench was still the one closest to where the shoot takes place.

He looked to the sky as a light breeze passed by him, the blue of his target of vision gave him something to remember,

'Ayase's not here, huh.'

Confusion riddled his heart as he thought about his feelings, his heart still full of uncertainty; he wanted to meet Ayase while at the same time fearing the occurrence, he wanted to apologize to her while oblivious of the way to do it and of the outcome. Contradiction filled his mind and tired himself further than he ever wanted.

Frustrated, he threw the emptied can he was holding to the garbage, magically tossing it in like a professional baseball pitcher.

'Why, why am I so.. scared..?'

It was probably because, if he explained the circumstances and reasons of why he rejected her, he feared Ayase would leave Kirino, and in the worst case, forever. Kirino found it very hard when she quarreled with Ayase back then, what would her reaction be if Ayase never want to see her again? She would definitely break, Kyousuke was sure of it.

Then, should he not explain to her? What if she asked? Should he just utterly lie? He had considered it but there's no way he could, especially since the girl had the power to see through lies, just like Manami and Kuroneko.

And he knew so well, lying to her might just get himself killed, especially now after he promised to never lie again to her.

But what bewildered him the most was that an unidentifiable force kept on pushing him to meet her again, continually burning his desire to face her and 'be friends' with her again. Every time this unknown force showed itself, it would wash him with memories of his 3 months with Kirino, then his 1 month with Ayase, though sometimes the order would switch around randomly, and all of this actually confused him in more ways than one.

But surprisingly, this time, the unnamed force left him with something flickering, like it had ignited something inside of him and gave him the spirit he thought he was losing.

The force that usually comes and goes on its own, bringing everything yet leaving nothing, now left him with memories sweeter-than-sugar and far from bitter. Scenes of fun times, and flashes of her smiles, just how bad he missed all of them.

'…Everything will be fine, it'll be fine…'

A reassurance made its way into his heart, he grasped it with full acceptance and promised himself to make up with his lovely angel. The chance of success might be low, but if he kept on dwelling in overthinking with no clear move, then the only one greeting him would be despair and regrets.

Clenching his fists, he brimmed with resolve.

'I can do it, I need to.'

* * *

 **A/N:** I don't know if you guys feel it too, but, I feel like this chapter is not one of my better works.. Like it's missing something.. I kept re-reading it over and over again to try to find the mistake, but I eventually gave up and decided to just post it lol. If any of you know the sections of this chapter (or the story so far, for that matter) that need to be improved, please kindly leave a review.

YuukiAsuna-chan: I'm sorry to say that Manami is going to appear again in future chapters, but I don't really have any major roles for her, so I hope that's alleviating enough for you ;) I do hope you'll enjoy the whole story though.


	7. The Walk Back

**A/N:** Yet again, I owe you guys an apology. Sorry for not updating in such a long time. I'll be honest with you:

I ran out of ideas.

I do have the big segments of the story planned out, the hard part was filling in the little things and details so that the story can flow naturally and not be too rushed or fast-paced. And also, writing turns out to be just a seasonal hobby for me. It all depends on my mood and ideas. If I don't feel like it, never mind writing a whole chapter, I can't even put together a goddamn paragraph. I hate myself. I tried forcing myself to write at times and the story.. Didn't turn out so well.. It felt really forced, and weird, and awkward, so I decided to just write when I want to, which explains why this chapter is pretty short. Again, sorry for that.

Need to let you know that chapters will be put out _very_ irregularly from now on (as if it's not already irregular enough..). Please do note that I still love this series very much, and plan to re-watch it some time in the next holiday. Hopefully it'll reinstate all the imaginations I had when I started writing the first few chapters.

'. . .' Thoughts

". . ." Outspoken Words

 _". . ." Outspoken Words - Flashback_

* * *

He spent so much time ruminating that when he returned his attention back to Kirino, there wasn't even 5 minutes before she returned to his place.

"Enjoyed the scene, siscon?" She sneeringly teased him the moment she arrived.

Kyousuke chuckled, "Do I really need to answer that?"

She giggled slightly, "Never mind, you probably shouldn't."

"Should we head home?" He got up and walked a few steps ahead.

She gave confirmation with a curt hum, and started walking by his side.

"See you later, Kirino!" The two models bid farewell simultaneously to their friend.

"Un! See you!"

The two also gestured a wave towards Kyousuke, to which he responded by simply raising his hand a bit. Kyousuke never bothered asking Kirino for their names, chances being he would never meet them again, plus not wanting to give Kirino any ideas that might get him an elbow to the chest.

Kyousuke was about to habitually take her hand in his before realizing his subconscious' intention, flushing himself red as a result. Good thing Kirino was focused on her phone and missed it, or else the scene would turn unbearably awkward.

It was almost 5 pm, the sky was starting to show taints of dark yellow. It was only a few minutes into the silent walk home that Kirino's voice vibrated the air,

"Hey."

"H-Hm? What is it?"

"What's with the stutter? You sounded creepy.."

"Don't mind it, weren't you going to say something?" He tried his best to avert Kirino from noticing the leftover blush on his face.

"Oh, yeah… Umm…"

"?"

"…About earlier this afternoon, on our walk here…" Her tone drops, almost into a murmur.

"Oh, about the thing that was bothering you?"

"…Yeah…" Her expression turned into that of a mix of sadness and loneliness, worrying Kyousuke instantly.

"What about it?"

"You see, actually, Ayase was supposed to model with me today."

Kyousuke shuddered at the sentence, was it supposed to be a good thing that she didn't come? Or was it the opposite?

"Why isn't she around then?" Trying not to voice out his ongoing inner conflict, he put on a mask of curiosity.

"…Just this afternoon, she told me she had something else to do and couldn't come, and that she already has a substitute for her."

'A substitute huh? Must be one of the models that were with Kirino just now.' Kyousuke thought.

"What's wrong about that?"

"It's strange. Looking for a substitute is not always easy, you can't just cancel a modeling appointment on such a short notice."

"Maybe she had already planned for something like this, so she already looked for a substitute, right?"

"It's possible, but it's really unlike her. Not to mention how eagerly she sounded in our conversation yesterday. She also usually tells me if she might not be able to come, it's really weird how she kept being quiet until the time of shoot."

"Hmm… Hearing you say that, I don't really have any explanation besides that it's something really urgent on her side."

"There's one more thing."

"?"

"She wouldn't tell me what she's doing, no matter how much I ask."

"Huh?"

"Like I said, she wouldn't tell me anything. I asked her 3 times already but her answers are all vague and unclear, it's plain obvious that she's hiding something…"

"Maybe it's really personal, and she just couldn't tell you right now. You can ask her later when you meet her."

"I suppose so, but its suddenness is what's bothering me."

"Did she show any kind of gestures that suggested this? Or did you two talk about something that might've been the cause?"

"I don't know.. I really don't think I've said anything that might've hurt her or something.."

"Are you sure?"

"Ugh, I'm sure! What are you gonna ask next? The topic we talked about? What a creep."

"Hey, I never said that. I was just saying that you would probably find something if you recalled what you discussed recently."

"*grumbles* The only thing we talked about last night was about today's shoot, and-…" She trailed off on her last remark; silence lingered for a bit before Kyousuke responded,

"…And?"

She shakes her head, "…It's nothing."

"Well, that 'nothing' might actually be the answer."

"Ugh, it's really nothing! What do you think you know, idiot?!" She screamed pretty hard on that one, stunning Kyousuke silent.

'Damn, what the heck, just when I thought she was in a good mood too.." He relented. 'To think that she got that angry, just what was it that they discussed?'

'…'

'…There's no way..' She started wondering while increasing her pace to leave her annoying brother behind.

'…It can't be the reason, can it..?' Kirino pondered deep down.

*last night*

"Kuuuu, that was so cute! I need to play this game more often!"

At her room, Kirino was continuously praising the new game she had bought the day before, when she went with Kyousuke to Akihabara. She apparently had been waiting for this game since its initial development stage, restlessly googling any and all information she could get her hands on, of course, front and foremost; its release date. At the eagerly anticipated day, she slapped Kyousuke awake very early in the morning, despite the release hour being later that afternoon.

.

" _Ouch! What is it?!"_

" _Wake up you sleepyhead, we're going to Akihabara! Go get yourself ready!"_

" _7 A.M?! The store isn't even open yet!"_

" _We're going to have to wait far back in the line if we're late! And I don't want that!"_

" _But really, Kirino? 7 A.M? Can't you give me at least 2 more hours?"_

" _Nope, I've waited far too long for this day, I won't let you ruin it."_

" _Kuuhh! Fine! Get off me then!"_

 _._

'It was his fault for not waking up sooner though.'

'Tsundere till the end' is what everyone would think if they know this real part of Kirino, which she only made known to her close ones.

.

" _So, what time is it going to be released?"_

" _3 P.M."_

" _WHAT!? That's 7 hours from now!"_

" _I know, idiot. No need to yell."_

" _Do we really have to go there now? Can't we delay it a bit? Because I might be in love with this sofa."_

" _Gross. We're going, NOW. Come on."_

After arriving there, Kirino immediately ran to the store, and Kyousuke followed suit. They found that the store was still closed, obviously. So they killed some time while having Kirino pouting all day. They later found themselves passing by the store again after circling around the town, to which Kirino had Kyousuke stand in front of the store to make sure he was the first in line, while she continued her stroll around. By this time, Kyousuke was the one who frowned.

.

'Didn't matter, we got the game.'

She had just finished one route before trailing off in her thoughts.

'Well, I'm thanking him tomorrow anyway.' Her 'dere' side resurfacing as she giggled.

Suddenly, she heard her phone rang, probably louder than it actually was because she wasn't paying attention.

'Ah, it's Ayase.'

*click* " _Moshi-moshi_ , good evening Ayase. What's up?"

"Good evening, Kirino. Are you busy right now?"

"Not really, is there something you want to talk about?" Her tones got brighter as she started assuming her high class, role model personality.

"Yes, it's about tomorrow's modeling, you already know the theme right?"

"Yeah, it's casual, isn't it? What about it?"

"Have you picked your clothes?"

"Mhm, I'm going to use my pink frilly dress we bought last time when we went shopping together."

"Oh, that one? As expected of you Kirino, you know what's best for you. Pink really is your color isn't it?"

"Hahaha, thanks Ayase, pink just suits me best I think. Why did you ask though?"

"I'm still wondering about what clothes I am going to wear, I haven't decided yet." Ayase's voice lowers, colored by anxiety, along with slight agitation.

"Ehhh? But the shoot's tomorrow! You need to decide soon!"

"I know, I know, that's why I called you. I wanted to ask for your opinion."

To be asked by a girl of high fashion-sense, it felt weird for Kirino.

"Hmm, what color do you prefer?"

"I think probably white or blue."

"Then, how about you use the white one from back then, when you subbed me as the lead model?"

"Umm, I don't know, that dress is over 2 years old. Even if it fits, the color is no longer as bright as it was."

"Aww, and that one suited you so much too… Then do you have a lavender one? It will match well with my pink!"

"Oh, you think so? My mom just bought me a lavender dress a few days ago, wait a minute okay? I'm going to put it on and take a picture so you can see it."

"Wait wait wait! No, don't!"

A sudden shift in Kirino's voice prompted confusion from the dark-haired girl, "Huh? Why?"

"You're going to show me at our modeling place, okay? I want to see it first with my own eyes!" Kirino giggled cheerfully as she said that.

"O-Okay.. But how am I going to ask for your opinion, then? I don't think this dress is going to work well without any accessory.."

"It's fine, you can just describe how the dress looks like! I'll help you find accessories that fits it, plus I can bring some of mine too so you can put it on when we meet up!"

"Ah, I see. Good idea, Kirino!" Ayase's voice started sounding optimistic, and much less gloomy compared to the way she was before. Kirino giggled slightly, joyous to know that she could help her best friend the same way Ayase did to her on some previous occasions. They were very close to each other to the point that Kirino almost considered Ayase her own sibling, and even more so now that she had come to accept Kirino's otaku hobby.

The two girls then continued their talk about everything related to tomorrow's modeling, including the time of departure and routes taken, so that Kirino could give Ayase the accessories she promised she would bring as soon as possible. The conversation flows naturally and eventually ended up with Ayase saying that she was going to go there alone because her mom had something work-related to do.

Noticing the specific shift in topic, a certain thought came flying down to her; Ayase was the only one who she still hadn't told a thing regarding Kyousuke coming to the shoot.

Sweat started to creep out her palm, was it the phone's heat that she's holding? Or was it nervousness?

Her eyes began darting around her room, her mind searching for words and ways to convey the unprecedented event about to occur tomorrow. She needed a logical reason behind inviting Kyousuke to the shoot, aside from the truth of course. She still found the need in her to mask her true self with a stoic outer; her brother-hating persona.

"..Kirino? Are you there?"

"A..Ah, yeah, I'm here, Ayase. Sorry, I drifted a bit there, you were saying?"

"I asked if we should meet up somewhere first, so we could exchange accessories before the shoot starts."

"O-Ou, that's a nice idea, but.."

"Hm?"

Deciding to be straightforward and just say the truth, she took a deep breath, preparing her heart to find out what her best friend's reaction will be.

"I'll be.. Going to the shoot with him."

"Him? W-Wait, by 'him', d-do you mean.. _O-Onii-san_?!"

"Y-Yeah.."

"But, why?"

"D-Don't get the wrong idea, okay?! It's only because he asked to come, and I'm allowing it this one time only!"

"O-Oh.. Yeah, this is the first time too, isn't it?"

"Y-Yeah.. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, Ayase. Is it fine?"

"..A-haha, it's fine Kirino, at least I know that we're expecting a guest now. We can meet up at the grocery store near the intersection, is that okay with you?"

"O-Okay, good idea! Well, see you tomorrow then, Ayase!"

"Y-Yeah, see you, Kirino!"

*click*

"Phew, that was rather nerve-wracking.. Tomorrow, huh?"

The brown-haired girl breathed a sigh of relief the moment she ended the call. Anticipation and eagerness flowed from her as she thought about tomorrow's event, and everything surrounding it.

Smiling to herself, she stood up and got out of her room. A subtle tune playing joyfully in her little heart.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the phone, the blue-haired girl was still holding the phone in her hand. Her eyes fixated on the white tile of floor her feet was on, the sound of her pulse reaching to her ear, as a certain sentence echoed relentlessly in her tired mind.

" _I'll be.. Going to the shoot with him."_

She laid her back on her bed, the becoming of her mind into a dark prison clearly mirrored by the lasting dull in her unfocused eyes. The very word of 'him' surging a waterfall of memory, too painful to hold retain, too beautiful to wash away.

The sheer thought brought forth a heavy atmosphere to her surroundings, her breath slowly becoming irregular by the passing seconds. She bit her lower lip, her fists clenching in an effort to reel away the pain she was starting to feel.

She put her arm on her forehead, a faint sparkle at the edge of her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Kirino.."

"..I can't..."

* * *

 **A/N:** Btw, I got a new keyboard, so, yay.


End file.
